Two-Month Retrospective

The Lord woke me up early on Monday morning. He used my daughter to do it, but I know it was Him. I can't remember ever being wide awake at 4:00 am, but I was that day. I soon realized that it was the twenty-seventh—exactly two months since my husband, Brent, had been critically injured in an attempted robbery at the bank where he works. As I lay there, I started enumerating the things I have learned from this experience, and I want to share some of them with you here.

For the reader or two who may not be aware of what I am talking about... On the morning of October 27, Brent arrived at the bank where he works to find a gunman in his office holding his close friend and co-worker, Matt, hostage. The gunman's intention was to rob the bank, but Matt and Brent arrived earlier than he anticipated and foiled his plan. The vault is on a timer, and the loan officers do not have access to the code to open the vault. Otherwise, they would have gladly accommodated him!

In the events that followed, Brent was gun butted in the head, suffered a dislocated shoulder, and was shot through both thighs with what we later learned was a .357 Magnum. Miraculously, the bullet hit no bones, nerves, or blood vessels. After seeing the entry and exit locations of the bullet in Brent's right leg, one doctor said that it was "an act of God" that the bullet did not hit his femoral artery. Thankfully, Matt suffered no physical injuries. However, he had been held at gunpoint for nearly thirty minutes before Brent arrived. We are confident that Matt's actions that morning saved Brent's life.

Brent's recovery and return to normalcy have been miraculous. He will always have scars and aches and pains as a result of the physical injuries he sustained, but it could have been so much worse, and we are thankful that it was not. Anyone who believes in the sovereignty of God understands that there is a purpose in the circumstances He allows in our lives, and that being the case, we should always be attentive to what He is trying to teach us through our experiences. I know that there are things I will never understand this side of heaven, but where I can know and understand, I want to be faithful to use the lessons I have learned to grow as follower of Jesus Christ. As I told a friend of mine, I do not want to go back to being who I was before this happened.

That being said, following are some of the things I have learned through this experience:

1. How you react to and handle circumstances largely determines how your children will react to and handle them.

Brent actually called me himself that morning to let me know what had happened. (He neglected to tell me that he thought he was bleeding to death!) He calmly and very succinctly told me there had been an attempted robbery, he had been shot in the leg (no "s"!), and to meet him at the emergency room. After making a few phone calls, during which I was quite shaken, I was able to calmly communicate to my children what had happened, that I had talked to Daddy myself, and that he was fine. We then sat on the floor together, and I prayed. Before I had finished, my friend Bronwyn had arrived to take charge of the children, and her husband, Philip soon took me to the hospital.

Bronwyn took the children on to school, and later, my mom arrived in town and took them back to our home with her. She told me a about their conversations that day. The children had many questions, and they were somewhat fearful that first night, but by the time we came home the following evening, they seemed to be fine. They still occasionally ask if the robber has been caught (He has not.), but they do not seem fearful or to have otherwise been affected. We have not tried to hide the truth from them, and we take every opportunity we can to glorify the Lord before them. I believe that, like for us, this experience has strengthened their faith.

2. His grace IS sufficient.

My children have handled these circumstances so well because I have handled them so well, and that has been by the grace of God. Anyone who knows me well knows that I am a crier. I am not easily emotionally manipulated, but if there is genuine emotion to be experienced in a situation, I am likely to experience it. I have often wondered what people sitting around me in church think of me, I am so prone to tears. However, beyond shedding a few tears while making phone calls that morning and reacting to the doctor's report at the emergency room, I did not cry at all. I was amazingly calm. I never questioned why this had happened to us. I rested completely in the sovereign will and unfailing love of the Father, and He was faithful. I can now say with confidence that I have known the peace that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:7).

3. Grown men still cry.

I was extremely touched by the number of men who expressed their love and concern for Brent. The visits, phone calls, text messages, emails, cards, and Facebook postings encouraged him and kept him occupied during the days he was not able to be up and about. Not a few of our male visitors wept openly upon seeing Brent for the first time after the shooting. Many of them prayed with him. Brent is a very quiet and reserved man, so it is easy for him to assume that he doesn't have that many friends. This experienced has proven otherwise.

4. Do not underestimate or undervalue the Body of Christ.

When I refer to the Body of Christ, I don't just mean our home church, I mean fellow believers throughout our community and the people they are in contact with all over the world. Hundreds of people we don't even know were praying for us, and we could tell! (See number two, above.) People we barely know sent cards and brought over meals. When we started getting out again, Brent was hugged and encouraged wherever we went. I have never felt so loved in my life as I was during this time that, in human terms, should have been unbearably difficult. God places his children in the Body for our benefit and His glory, and when we neglect His design and our place in it, we shortchange ourselves and the potential for blessing.

5. There are no insignificant acts of grace.

I can't take credit for that pithy phrase. I heard it first from my pastor several years ago, and I never forgot it. It has proven especially true in recent months. I think people, myself included, often don't do anything to minister to people in crisis because we don't know what to do, and we don't know what to say. Brent and I have learned that it doesn't really matter. Just being there is what matters. There were a number of people who drove to Savannah to the trauma center and just sat in the waiting room, never able to see Brent, but we knew they were there. We had visitors that I would have never expected. They often didn't say very much. They certainly didn't attempt to wax eloquent or philosophize on the situation. One woman whom I had only met once or twice and whose daughter was in a coma on another floor in the same hospital came down to speak to me and gave me all of the money in her pocket so I could buy a Diet Coke. Just letting someone know that you are there and that you care, matters.

I have learned some other things that I won't share here, and as time goes by, I'm sure God will reveal more, but for now, I want to be faithful to the spirit of II Corinthians 1: 3-7:

³Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, ⁴who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. ⁵For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. ⁶If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. ⁷Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort.

You have shared in our sufferings. I hope that through what I have written here you will share in our comfort.