Holy Week Revelation and Resolution

On Monday, I wrote in my journal one of those entries that I can hardly bear to go back and read again. My quiet time that day was a prayerful struggle that lead to my downloading Tullian Tchividijian's  Jesus + Nothing = Everything. I now have absolutely no recollection how I ended up there, but it soon became clear why I did. I needed to be reminded of the Gospel.

And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with  him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross. —Colossians 2:13-14 (ESV)

I read Tullian's book in about two days, and then proceeded on to J.D. Greear's Gospel, which I am still in the process of reading. Greear says the effect of not staying focused on the Gospel is to live in the extremes of pride and despair. That's where I have been for a long time. I have not been living moment by moment believing the Gospel in my heart—no matter how firmly established it is in my mind. Continually believing the Gospel in light of the circumstances of life is how to work out my salvation with fear and trembling (Philippians 2:12-13). I must struggle to believe in spite of a natural inclination not to, a fall back position of performance-orientation and self-preservation, and feelings that I seem powerless to overcome. We Christians are quick to assent to the fact that the Gospel saves us from hell, but we are extremely slow to understand that it saves us from ourselves. I desperately need saving from myself.

So on this Good Friday 2012, I resolve to preach the Gospel to myself every day, as often as necessary. And as I do this, Lord, please save me from myself.



(Photo was taken in the Hagia Sophia in Istanbul, Turkey.)